Steps Family Therapy

  One of my greatest frustrations in family therapy is the pressure of sending kids to school. Don’t get me wrong, I think education is awesome. But it shouldn’t be used as a bludgeon to our mental health… which we need to become educated. How does this happen? One reason is–ironically–the lack of education. If a kid is having an urge to not go to school, there is a REAL reason for it (one that isn’t a character flaw). Most of the time, there are serious issues going on outside of academics, such as marital conflict, bullying, friend tension, feeling misunderstood, etc. When these stressors build up, they will first make us anxious: we enter Fight/Flight brain, where logic and learning capacity decrease, and we enter “survival mode” when we do just enough to get by with the bare minimum. This is a hard state to go to school in, but it’s manageable. *And, even if it is just about not feeling prepared for a test, seeing a crush, or avoiding friend drama, there are VALID emotions beh...

  How to Put Your Kids in Residential Treatment… Sort of… How could sending your kids away actually help them? Interesting question. In the short-term, kids tend to experience significant changes while at Residential Treatment Centers (RTCs). They can move from total mental and emotional dysfunction to thriving in 8-12 months in such an environment. Unfortunately, the long-term prognosis isn’t so great. Children often revert back to old symptoms after they return to old environments. They are likely to retain some gains from residential, but not all. This shows that people’s symptoms arise in strong relation to their environment. What is it about RTCs then? RTCs aim to apply the basic principles of human development, and generally have better resources to do so than many families. First and foremost, they seek to do no harm. The most direct way to induce anxiety, anger, and depression is to use inherently harmful actions or words. Corporal punishment is illegal in most residential ...